Season’s Greetings from the biggest kindest dingus you know! It’s that weird time of year where everyone is thinking about the changes in lifestyle they want to make for 2020, but hasn’t quite committed to anything yet.

Let me plant this worm in your ear: live by the to-do list. And YOU GUESSED IT, PALS: I’ve got some pretty decent arguments in favor of adopting to-do lists into your day-to-day:

1 ) REEVALUATE EVERYDAY
Sometimes, you write something down that seems crucial to remember in the moment. Someone recommends a new TV show to watch, you hear about a limited-quantity item now available you want to try and pick up if you have the time, or you tell yourself there’s a hobby you’re going to pick up or pick back up after a hiatus.

Here’s the most obvious thing I’m ever going to say: things change and what’s important is that you remember to be flexible as well.

Do you know how many days in a row I wrote down “Record solo music” to remind myself to look at some original material I hadn’t finished before I finally realized that I just didn’t give a fuck about doing that right now? It’ll get done someday. But it just doesn’t fit the path I’m trying to take.

Sit down with your to-do list when you notice it approaching your personal threshold for anxiety-inducing levels of tasks ahead. Be real about where you want to put your focus. Cross out anything that doesn’t fit into that focus. Or move it forward to another day, which hits another point we will get to…

2 ) BREAK DOWN YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS
The absolute hands-down best advice I’ve ever received about list-making was including the process and not simply the end result.

Let me clarify: let’s say you wanted to write a novel. So you bust out your to-do list, get that green colored marker/pen (no idea why I use green), and write “finish novel” on that sucker.

Wrong. This is the easiest-to-make, but most common, mistake in living by the list. Remember that every step in a process is another check mark you should let yourself make on your to-do. Let yourself see, feel and celebrate the progress.

That’s the important thing that gets missed in neglecting to recognize each individual step. Every step is progress, even if some steps are momentary or easy as pie. It’s still a step you didn’t have to take, and a step closer to where you hope to be.

3 ) DAILY PLANNER
I live my life by lists. I always have; it’s the one strong habit that was engrained into me from an early age that I’ve managed to hold onto.

But there’s a key piece of advice I want to give anyone who already lives by the list or is hoping to live by the list: break it down.

Break. It. Down.

This is so important, and here’s why: finishing a task is so much more than one checkmark. It’s more than a single finished task. Getting to the finish line is a culmination of a number of successes (and maybe some failures or missteps) that often go unnoticed as they just feel like steps to progress to the end goal.

I want to strongly emphasize the importance of breaking down your goals to help reinforce the achievement of reaching that end goal. It shows you the progress you’ve taken and acts as a reminder that you’re moving forward even if completion is still a few steps ahead.

Let’s use baking cookies as an example: you get your planner, because you now have one of those as a responsible well-adjusted member of society, and write “Bake Cookies”. But you don’t have the ingredients! So, you head to the store and arrive home exhausted with bags in hand.

But that task still remains unchecked as these bad boys aren’t going to bake themselves. You’ve exerted yourself in a task that goes unrecognized.

So, just above “Bake cookies”, we add “Get groceries” and put a solid checkmark alongside this first step. You’re on the way! You did a thing! You’re farther ahead than you once we’re, and that’s worth celebrating.

Remember to build your lists to celebrate your small victories as much as your big wins. And remember not to put a task in your daily planner for today that you know you won’t get to until this weekend. Just put it on the weekend’s list. Allocating your list appropriately can keep an anxiety-inducing list from seeming overwhelming in the moment.

..

As you may have noticed, I haven’t done a podcast in a few weeks at this point. I’m just doing a little revamp of the whole thing, trying to expand upon the original idea of the podcast into what I’d like to see it become in the new year.

A new episode will be up real soon, and I’m hoping to make (at least a portion of) the show available in video form. So we’ll see how that goes. I preach positive vibes here so I may as well take my own advice and say you’ll be seeing a lot more episodes in 2020.

Looking forward to hearing more from you guys, reach out with any ideas or thoughts on Instagram, Twitter or Facebook.

And don’t forget to do something nice for yourself this Holiday season. It’s easy to be an asshole to yourself this time of year; try not doing that instead and you’ll be amazed at the miracles it can do if you just try not to actively be the worst to yourself.

Til next time,

Brad

Hiya, folks

You know, truly, I’m at a loss as to how to start writing something like this. We’re twenty episodes deep and, if you haven’t at this point figured out what we’re about, I’m afraid I’m not going to be able to hep you figure this one out.

But, I can try: I’m a guy who tries to put an above-average amount of time and effort into being better. Not the best, or unstoppable, or top of the heap. Better.

Self-help can be a motherfucker of a rabbit hole to climb into. The deeper you go, the more you’re expected to suspend your own understanding of a thought. The more you learn to suspend the nature of your own impulse, the more you’re asked to trust in a doctrine beyond your own natural trains of thought.

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Seasonal Affective Disorder: Very Real, Very Garbage

Ahoy-hoy, folks! This is Brad, your podcast host and fearless leader on the Super Adult journey of taking baby steps towards just being a little less trash. We’ll be posting a great NEW episode real soon about self care and the importance of practicing gratitude as you become an old grumpy fart, but in the meantime I wanted to share some thoughts on the topic.

It’s tough to remember to be kind to yourself sometimes. We’re told to try our best to be kind to those around you, but we sometimes lose sight that it’s equally important to build yourself up and be your own biggest fan. Sometimes, it just doesn’t feel like you ARE your biggest fan.

I’ve hit this wall myself. Sometimes, a little self reflection pulls back the veil and shows us how little we respect the habits we’ve created or how little we understand the path we’re taking anymore.

I’ll always support self-reflection, but it’s just as important to remember that we need to properly focus our criticism. We often beat ourselves up for our missteps when we fail to acknowledge the importance of these moments. They teach us the wrong path, which is as important to discover as the right path. We fear and avoid the pain of taking the wrong path without truly acknowledging the power in fucking up.

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“Gratitude turns what we have into enough.” – Anonymous

Look, I’ll be honest: at worst, I’m about the least together human that I know. I’m short tempered, I can be reactionary, and I let my heart do the thinking when I know I should let my head make the important calls.

I love to keep in mind that it’d be a hell of a lot worse if I lived obliviously unaware of these shortcomings, but I’ll also admit that it’s overwhelming to have a self-admitted problem in front of you with the sole solution being to simply be better.

Being better, at its essence, is simply acting how you would want people around you to act. Or, more specifically, act in a way that creates balance or harmony around you. Surround yourself with what builds you up, learn to let go of what inhibits you. At its core, it’s the simplest thing. Be the change, the ripple in the pool, that you wish to see in the world.

It’s a brilliantly advised first step to any journey of self-improvement, but the vague concept of being better means something different to everyone. To someone feeling walked over and taken advantage of, asserting yourself and standing your ground when you feel it’s necessary can feel like the logical conclusion to empower and better yourself with confidence and the ability to speak your mind freely.

All Great Advice.

All great advice.

On the other hand, I quite frankly can’t shut the fucking fuck up. I over-talk, over-explain, paraphrase and repeat myself to the point of utter exhaustion for those who have to be around me. So, being better means something different to me.

Sure, it means shutting my fucking mouth a little more. But it means listening, too. It means learning to give people the floor, rather than feeling like I have to proverbially hold court as a social role.

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